Every day, families suffer through the loss of loved ones. Grief tends to be a long and emotionally investing process for all family members. However, grief requires a particular understanding of death, a deep bond with whomever was lost, as well as a certain level of maturity, to fully affect an individual. Wisdom and maturity are qualities not well associated with young children, by not being in the world for very long. Young children also tend to make superficial bonds with their siblings and friends due to their immaturity. In The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger, unlike the older Holden, youth is shown to protect Phoebe Caulfield from suffering through the grief following Allie's death.

To understand Phoebe's lack of grieving, it is important to first understand Holden's grief, in order to compare the two. The grief caused by Allie's death shifts Holden to a much more depressed person who romanticizes the past. Holden goes into a fit of rage immediately after Allie's death, as Holden explains, “I was only thirteen, and they were going to have me psychoanalyzed and all, because I broke all the windows in the garage … It was a very stupid thing to do, I'll admit, but I hardly didn't know what I was doing while I was doing it, and you didn't know Allie” (Salinger 38). Holden is so affected by Allie's death that he can't even control his own actions. Holden mentions that he is thirteen, which is young, yes, but old enough to feel a very real connection with his brother. Holden's brother, D.B., later describes the grieving process of his aunt during the funeral: “They all came when Allie died, the whole goddam stupid bunch of them. I have this one stupid aunt with halitosis that kept saying how peaceful he looked lying there, D.B. told me” (Salinger 155). Holden's inability to understand his aunt's mourning can teach us about his. Holden's grief manifests in a very intense way, while others' manifest in a more private way. After this point, Holden goes into a depressive state, dreading the future and constantly yearning for the past. This is best shown when Phoebe asks him to name something he likes: ““You can't even think of one thing.” “Yes, I can. Yes, I can.” “Well do it then.” “I like Allie,” I said … “Allie's dead—You always say that! If somebody's dead and everything, and in Heaven, then it isn't really—”” (Salinger 171). This is a prime example of how Holden continuously romanticizes and yearns for the past. It's significant that, when pressed about what he likes, Holden first says Allie, whose loss begins his downward spiral that we see in the novel. Allie's death makes Holden a much more troubled person who continuously idolizes the past.

Due to her young age, Phoebe Caulfield is protected from suffering through the grief following Allie's death. Not much is said about her reaction immediately following Allie's death, but from Holden's narration, we can gather some critical details. Firstly, while Holden is contemplating reactions to his own death, he thinks about Phoebe: ““The only good thing, I knew she wouldn't let old Phoebe come to my goddam funeral because she was only a little kid. That was the only good part” (Salinger 155). As the events of the book take place years after Allie's death, it's safe to assume that, if Holden assumes that his parents wouldn't bring Phoebe to his hypothetical funeral, then they definitely wouldn't have brought her to Allie's funeral. Going to the funeral of whoever you lost can be an important step in grieving and eventually acceptance. Although, it might have been more harmful than beneficial to expose her to such a solemn event. This is because, later in the novel, Phoebe appears to place no emotional importance on the memories she made with Allie. Holden attempts to get Phoebe on the carousel, a special activity Phoebe did with Allie: “Do you want to go for a ride on it?” I said. I knew she probably did. When she was a tiny little kid, and Allie and D.B. and I used to go to the park with her, she was mad about the carrousel. You couldn't get her off the goddam thing. “I'm too big.” she said” (Salinger 210). Even though she was young, Phoebe would very likely remember the carousel since the novel only takes place a few years after these events. If she had a strong bond with her siblings at the time and if the carousel held special memories to her, she probably would not reject Holden's offer to ride it flat out. But she does reject it, and that's because the bond a very young child can have with their older siblings is relatively shallow. Young children do not have the capability to put a lot of emotional value into their friendships, mostly seeing them as opportunities for fun. Holden, who was older at the time of those memories, attempts to relive them with Phoebe, to bring back the past with Allie. Phoebe's memories, by contrast, don't carry the same emotional weight as Holden's because Phoebe, as a young child, didn't have a deep relationship with Allie.

In The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger, unlike her brother Holden, youth is shown to protect Phoebe Caulfield from suffering through the grief following Allie's death. Salinger made Phoebe younger than Holden for a purpose. Not only so that Holden would have a person in his life whom he truly loved, but to demonstrate the importance of age. The real difference between these two characters is their age at this formative event. Salinger made Holden old enough to fully comprehend Allie's death and be hurt by it, but too young to know how to cope with it. He made Phoebe too young to be scarred by the loss, and so she doesn't seem to be as cynical as Holden or go through the depressive episodes Holden does. Age and death are both out of our control, and yet both affect who we are in fundamental ways.